lolBlog

When Dan is quiet … millions of things are running in his mind, usually something to do with faeces. When Dan is not arguing … he is thinking deeply about farting. When Dan looks at you with eyes full of questions … he is wondering how long you poo for in an average day. When Dan answers ” I’m fine ” after a few seconds … he is about to fart.

When Dan stares at you … he is wondering have you smelt it yet. When Dan lays on your chest … you’ll probably struggle to breathe. When Dan wants to see you everyday… he wants to tell you weird shit. When Dan says ” I love you ” … he means it, but will call you a gay if you reply “I love you too” (Unless you are Gemma). When Dan says ” I miss you ” … He means that his angle of trajectory was a couple of degrees off, but next time you’re getting knocked the fuck out.

Life only comes around once make sure you spend it with the Dan … He calls you dude instead of mumbling in your general direction. he answers the phone when he’s having a poo, tells you about it and lets the silence grow uncomfortably. he will stay awake until he’s tired. Wait for Dan who … high fives your hand. Who wants to lol about the things in life to make you feel better, even though he did just kill your cat. Who scratches his balls in public. Who is constantly reminding you of how much skinnier you are than him.